15 Aug 2024, 16:08
" I will make you pay. I will make you pay for this so hard that you will deeply regret having done this alone for the consequences it will cause. Having all your threats here as emails, I will make this public and cause your career and Reputation to end. You will be hated and followed by foreign people who stand up for me. There will be people at your front door who will want to make you pay, believe me." L.O. (The terrified Victim)
Surviving the Storm - My Story
Why I’m Telling my Story
This is a true story. It’s a personal account of how one relationship, with someone I never even met in person, nearly destroyed me, my career, my marriage, my finances, and my sense of reality. It’s about what happened when I got pulled into the fantasy world of a malignant covert narcissist, who then abused, betrayed, discarded and attacked me. And who, even now, is still trying her best to destroy my life.
My name is Klaus Grabler, and I am not hiding.
Covert narcissists hide from scrutiny. This particular narcissist, a 30 year old German National whom I shall call L.O. is very experienced at playing the victim and she is even now portraying me as an unstable, out of control, narcissistic abuser. A psychopathic stalker. She has collected emails from me written during periods when she was abusing me and is now using these out of context to claim that I am terrorizing her and that I've destroyed her life. She pretends she's helpless and terrified of me.
Ultimately, we have never met in person, she hasn't lost anything, not her job, nor her health. She hasn't been harassed by police or banned from Telegram and WhatsApp. Yet, like every covert narcissist, she plays the perennial victim while always hiding from public view. Yet she has orchestrated a cyber attack that lasted 10 days, attempted to frame me for numerous cyber crimes and tried to steal my life savings from online accounts.
You will see my face on the banner of this site and in my upcoming video documentary series. That’s deliberate. I am not hiding from the world. Because I am not the narcissist. The real narcissist is the one pretending to be the victim. A 30 year old woman whose face you'll never see. Because she hates being exposed for what she truly is.
I don't wear a Mask
I’ve worked for years as a creative professional, 3D artist, writer, designer and consultant. I walk my dog, Rocky, every day, and I still believe in old style values and people, even after what I’ve gone through. I don’t speak from theory. I speak from real experience. This narcissist didn’t just lie to me and play with my emotions. She didn't just abuse, humiliate and insult me. She orchestrated a systematic psychological and digital campaign of abuse that:
-
Caused me to lose my employment, my equipment and means of making an income
-
Hijacked over 20 of my online accounts and attempted to frame me for various cybercrimes
-
Threatened me and my family with physical harm and weaponized law enforcement against me
-
Abused me psychologically, emotionally and mentally with the aim of destroying my life
- Stole my passwords and account details by installing Spyware
- Manipulated her employer into using his company resources against me.
But I am standing up and speaking out. Not just for myself, but to warn others like me. Victims of narcissistic abuse. Targets of long distance romance scams.
The three phases of the narcissistic abuse cycle
1. Idealization – The Bait
In this initial phase, L.O. presented herself as the perfect partner, charming, attentive, and emotionally in sync. She mirrored my values, my passions, even my communication style, creating the illusion of a soulmate connection. Everything I shared was stored for later weaponization. She researched me and used anything she found to manipulate me.
2. Devaluation – The Psychological Undermining
Once she had me emotionally invested, subtle shifts began. Passive-aggressive remarks. Sudden mood changes. She withheld affection, introduced ambiguity, or created triangulations This stage serves to unbalance the victim, keeping them desperate to “win back” the idealized version of her that never truly existed. Silent treatments, blame shifting and gaslighting.
3. Discard – The Surgical Exit
The discard phase isn’t just about leaving, it’s about leaving you in a state of maximum confusion and self-doubt. but as a final assertion of dominance. Each phase is a mask, and once it’s served its purpose, she discards it, just like the people behind them. After the discard came the attack. When that didn't work she set out to exact revenge by laying spurious charges against me.
A photograph similar to this one was uploaded on the 19th of November 2024, during the cyber attack on my accounts. It showed L.O. and her supposed "ex- boyfriend Dom, the same man with whom she had earlier made a 'deal' according to a recovered Whatsapp message from L.O. and Dom.. The photo was taken in Rastatt, her new place of employment, around September the 15th 2024, just outside the railway station. She is the one holding the camera and the fact the image was only uploaded during the attack more than a month later speaks volumes for intent.
This is the method of a malignant narcissist, hurt as much as you can to distract from the act of stealing in which she was engaged at the time. Yet she will now play the innocent victim to society, pretending she did nothing wrong, that, in fact, I am the abuser.
AI generated image based on a prompt.
The Fallout
Due to the psychological abuse and the constant manipulation I began questioning my own memory and self image. An innocent seeming request for my assistance turned into a life altering event, caused me substantial personal harm and almost destroying my 16 year marriage. My wife saw the truth, even when I couldn’t. She has stood by me when she did not have to. I will always be grateful to her for that.
We found our way back together, not by ignoring what happened, but by facing it. The narcissist failed utterly in her goal of driving us apart. She did her best to persuade me to get divorced and sell our house, future faking me with promises of a bright tomorrow, marriage and even a child. She almost succeeded. I fell for her lies.
Now I am determined to put on record exactly what happened, using the evidence I gathered to tell my story.
Why I’m Going Public
This site is not about revenge. It’s about accountability. By end of 2025 I will be releasing a video documentary series: "Mind of a Narcissist"
Each episode follows the timeline, month by month, from the narcissists first message to her final betrayal and the following investigations. You’ll hear voice messages, see emails and messages, and then judge for yourself what really happened.
But this isn’t just for me. It’s for anyone who’s ever been abused narcissistically. And it's to prove that I am not what most people automatically think when they hear the narcissists victimhood narrative.
if you recognize the person described in this story please contact me at info@surviving-the-storm.org .
The Covert Narcissist Exposed
This is a photo of me. I'm just an ordinary man, a 60 year old 3D animator from South Africa. All I ask is that you look at the evidence objectively. Who you believe is up to you. I am satisfied that I have told my side of the matter to the best of my ability. The truth will always emerge in the end.
L.O. conceals her true self behind her false mask, lying to and manipulating those around her, hiding behind her fake persona of the tragic victim. She uses companies, institutions and even the law and has created a narrative that I am some psychopathic stalker intent on destroying her life. This is typical behavior by people with NPD, buts very hard to see by people who haven't dealt with this disorder before.
The truth is that I am just an ordinary man, not some psychopath, and that I am the victim of her revenge fueled plan to destroy every aspect of my life. I have evidence of this. She continues her campaign to digitally harass and damage me. She has even gone as far as getting her employer to attempt a legal maneuver against me. She has blackmailed and threatened me, hacked my accounts, stolen my passwords from me, and gotten me banned from multiple social media sites. She will not stop.
Because I am a man and I am older than her the world pre-judges me. She is a master at playing the victim and twisting the story to suit her agenda. This is my only way of defending myself and of getting the truth out into the world.
Klaus Grabler
May 2025